Dare to Engage Personal Sustainability: The Lynchpin of Effective Leadership

If you are going to lead the way, you’re going to need some tools to support you on your path. Competence, instinct, inspiration, integrity, joy and the ability to engage people and create results are just a few of these things. There is something deeper. Often taken for granted, screaming for attention when it’s missing, foundational to all other qualities: “Personal Sustainability.” When you have it, you don’t notice it; when it’s borderline, you ache for it; and when it’s gone, you beg for it.

What is “personal sustainability?” Some executive coaching experts call it “self-care.” I define it as doing those things that bring your self alive, nurture your body and soul, give you more joy, energy, stamina and OOMPH, so you CAN engage again and again, making the impact you want in your life and organization.

Personal sustainability is all about doing the things that sustain you, so you can sustain your game, perhaps via clean eating, exercise, self-care, family time, engagement, joyful activities, scheduling, boundaries, etc. It’s an individual concoction and, without it, we risk burnout.

Personal sustainability of the leader is crucial. It is the lynchpin of effective leadership that supports us and holds it all together. Taking care of your self for effective leadership and executive coaching for “work/life balance” will not be a new idea or topic for this audience. We’ve all been there, done that. But what if:

• We REALLY created the space for people to hold personal sustainability at as high a priority as they would hold for bringing in a multi-million dollar deal, or improving performance for a promotion or for good parenting.
• More organizations provided the space, permission, championing and vehicles to engage in self-care regularly.
• We connected, on a daily basis, to our own PSPs (Personal Sustainability Plans).
• We lovingly invited folks to stop talking about it and get into action by taking on a whole new level of self responsibility, valuing self and others enough to engage in AUTHENTIC personal sustainability?

These performance improvement habits are worth the attention. It’s not rocket science, but the application and integration of it is. We’ve heard the statistics of rising healthcare costs and disease. (The latest: we will spend 4 trillion dollars in 2017 on healthcare.)

We see burnout around us, in the news, in our communities, in our own families and even in ourselves: a high-level executive suffers a heart attack, an over-extended working mom suffers a breakdown; the community hero gets a divorce after years of being disengaged from his family. These are not new scenarios. No one will disagree with me that personal sustainability is important; yet, I notice how quickly performance improvement undertakings fall to the bottom of the Outlook task list in service of doing almost anything else.

We need to help people find the space to give them permission to indulge in the art of self care. By engaging in our own self care, we create a more alive, engaging and joyful way of being (which is contagious.) We are all at choice here. This is about our IMPACT in effective leadership roles and how we set ourselves up to have the best impact possible.

Observe the impact of individuals practicing work/life balance and performance improvement, and how that affects their presence, clarity of thought, and performance.

• There is more “space” from which to lead.
• They’re more centered and present.
• They can do the work of twelve hours in eight because they’re present, clear-minded and energized.
• Their engagement is full-force, vs. surviving through the day at half-force making foggy decisions resulting in extra work for others and lower productivity for themselves.

Today’s effective leadership has the opportunity to create a future culture that nurtures and reveres self care. It’s not just about personal sustainability; it’s about being fully alive. This is not just about “self-focus”; it’s about being our best in our relationships, our work and our lives. Leading from this place, combined with the heart, the talent and the brilliance of each person, is where we can truly lead the way. It has to start somewhere and, as coaches and leaders, we are in a beautiful place to make an impact.

Anese Cavanaugh is a certified coach, author and speaker and the founder of Dare To Engage, Inc., a company devoted to helping leaders become top leaders in their organizations and their lives through coaching and training. Her specialty is helping leaders build a healthier, more engaged workforce, retain their top talent, develop greater authentic engagement and create stronger personal sustainability. She holds a degree and multiple credentials in the areas of coaching, wellness, leadership development and health & productivity improvement. For more about Anese or the Dare To Engage Programs or to receive a complimentary report and audio on “Energy & Results” go to www.DareToEngage.com

Leadership Coaching Tip: The Daring Art (and Heart) of Recovery

How many times have you had a situation at work, or at home, where you felt ‘knocked off-kilter’, ‘thrown for a loop’ or ‘disgruntled’?

Probably not often (wink). But for you who have experienced something like this, think about a particular situation. Did it come from a meeting, conversation or project that didn’t go so well, some harsh feedback, a flub as a public speaker or something that you just didn’t expect? It often feels like “failure.”

It happens to us all, and as painful as it is, this is a place where there lies an abundance of opportunity for growth in effective leadership.

Looking back at your “event,” what brought you back to center? Got you back on track? Helped you move forward? My guess is that you “recovered” - it may have been a quick or long and painful process – but you did it.

The act of “recovery” is a gift. It’s an art - and it’s much like a muscle. The more you exercise it, the stronger it becomes. Recovery is the ability to “get back” or “regain activity.” And for effective leadership, recovery is essential.

At a deeper level, the act of “recovery” also requires heart. Heart for yourself and heart for others. Compassion. Think about a time you goofed. What was necessary to “forgive” yourself? When someone else falls down, it’s essential to engage the heart and truly give them the space, courage and compassion to get up and come back stronger.

I believe heart, and the desire to create a positive impact, is at the center of recovery.

We all have our special processes for recovery. We all have our ways of engaging the heart. What are yours? Here are three common examples I see in personal coaching work with others.

Leadership Coaching Scenario One: You’re giving a big presentation and you make a mistake in the data. You feel yourself shuffle, perhaps flush, and so begins your inner dialogue: “I just totally messed up; oh, they’re never going to ask me in again; I’m going to lose this account!” So notice, where is your attention? It’s definitely not on the group. By now you’ve probably REALLY lost them.

Instead: Make your mistake, notice that you made it in the moment, correct it if necessary, and move on. Continue to be a fully engaged public speaker. Keep your attention on the presentation and the people in your audience.

Leadership Coaching Scenario Two: You’ve just completed a project that you think is really great. You send it out to your team and the feedback is scathing. (Maybe not “scathing”, but disappointing.) Here’s your chance: option one - you “shut down”, start to focus on how you’ve failed, how no one gets you, how you shouldn’t even be in this line of work, how YOU are a failure.

Instead: Get your feedback, put it all in your feedback “basket”, try to remember it’s not “personal” - it’s about the “thing”. Quickly remember that feedback is just feedback. What can you take from “this” feedback and use to move you forward? What systems might you put in place so this doesn’t happen again? For example, you might design in a structure for feedback before completion. Finally, make any necessary shifts, put this incident in your “future learning resource file” and move on.

Leadership Coaching Scenario Three: You’ve been exercising and eating clean for one month! Things are moving along, energy is up, inches are disappearing. This whole self-care thing rocks! And zing! It’s the holidays - parties, family, meals, and vacation all hit at once. Here’s your chance: option one - let go of all that good work; it’s a moot point anyway, why try? You’ve failed, so while you’re at it, you beat yourself up a bit.

Instead: Give yourself a break! Enough with the self-bullying. Do what you can: move your workouts to the morning, substitute the gym for brisk walks with family, continue to eat clean AND give yourself permission to enjoy some celebratory cheer. Make it fun.

For the rest of the month, notice when you need to recover and exercise those “muscles”! These things are bound to happen and they can be really challenging when they do. And with a bit of recovery, you’ll be right back on track moving forward to make the impact you want!

Anese Cavanaugh, of Dare To Engage, Inc., is a Certified Professional Coach with a focus in Leadership Development, Performance Improvement and Health and Productivity. She works with individuals and groups, privately and in organizations, to help them lead authentically and be their own best heroes in business and life. To learn more about her work with people, the DTE Programs and services, and for additional resources and tools, go to www.DareToEngage.com where you can also sign up for a Free Report (also available in audio format), on “Three Key Strategies to Lead Your Energy and Create Results (in Business, in Life and in Leadership)”.

Work/life Balance: How Personally Sustainable are You?

How much energy do you have? How sustainable is your leadership? Do you pull off your work at the expense of your family, your health or your peace of mind?

To lead with courage and authenticity, successful leaders must develop personal energy that lasts through sustained change. Energy leadership realizes a true impact at work and at home.
Busy days, full schedules and heavy workloads are here to stay. These facts won’t change, but how you engage them can. The hero’s journey starts here.

As a business and life coach, I’ve seen that true success involves more than making your numbers or building a powerful team. True success and personal fulfillment happens when you’ve found a way to make EVERY part of your life work, and to navigate the challenges of your work/life balance.

If you’re ready to create better results in every area of your life, to build stronger relationships and to have an authentically powerful impact, you’ve got to be ready to DARE TO ACHIEVE FULL ENGAGEMENT.

The lifestyle of the modern leader is tough. You can struggle against it, hide from it, or you can authentically ENGAGE it.

The choice is yours.

You CAN:

• ENGAGE challenging situations, relationships and schedules for clean, powerful outcomes.
• ENGAGE your health and well-being. That’s the foundation (and secret weapon) – the powersource – from which true, well-rounded success emerges.
• ENGAGE your mission and your desires — stopping the busy-ness long enough to evaluate your life and work and put systems and strategies in place for work/life balance.
In my years of leadership coaching, I’ve learned that for the typical leader, it usually comes down to a combination of seven obstacles:

Work/life Balance Obstacle #1: Fearing to step out of comfort zones,

Work/life Balance Obstacle #2: Being unclear in vision, intention or desired impact,

Work/life Balance Obstacle #3: Being unaware of impact on others,

Work/life Balance Obstacle #4: Making assumptions that hinder your team,

Work/life Balance Obstacle #5: Not knowing “how,”

Work/life Balance Obstacle #6: Avoidance of direct engagement and communication with people,

Work/life Balance Obstacle #7: Lacking the “decision,” time, focus or energy to take (and stay in) action.

These obstacles are not minor. There IS a limited amount of time to your day and these obstacles have the potential of sucking HOURS AND HOURS out of EACH day. But there’s hope – you CAN overcome these obstacles and take back your day. As a business and life coach, I have seen many of my clients engage and conquer these seven barriers to creating the results they want and achieving “work/life balance.”

DARING TO ENGAGE is about succeeding at work AND at home. As a leadership coaching expert, I’ve seen lots of people who can pull off one or the other. But it’s the rare hero who discovers the secret of being a fully engaged, effective leader at work and a committed, loving participant of life at home.

Anese Cavanaugh, of Dare To Engage, Inc., is a Certified Professional Coach with a focus in Leadership Development, Performance Improvement and Health and Productivity. She works with individuals and groups, privately and in organizations, to help them lead authentically and be their own best heroes in business and life. To learn more about her work with people, the DTE Programs and services, and for additional resources and tools, go to www.DareToEngage.com where you can also sign up for a Free Report (also available in audio format), on “Three Key Strategies to Lead Your Energy and Create Results (in Business, in Life and in Leadership,)”

Bringing DTE Home: Recovery in Motion in the Cold

Enjoying the beautiful and chilly season? We are! We’ve been in the Midwest for 8 years now and every year, my California blood has to re-adjust to these temperatures! Brrrr.

I am often asked by people all the time,”Why in the world would we leave California to come to Illinois?” It’s days like this that I can really get on board and start colluding with folks in this question. You can imagine my internal dialogue:”Why did we move here? Why is it so darn cold? What were we thinking? Gosh it’s horrible, horrible, horrible!! Brrr!”

You can also imagine how empowering that dialogue is and how energized I may feel going down that slippery slope. And if I take it one step further, imagine the impact that attitude can have on those around me! It’s pretty contagious!

This not only applies to the weather, but anything. Think about it. What do you focus on that doesn’t support you? Where do you get caught in focusing on what’s not working or how “cold” it is?

The trick, I have found, has been in the “recovery” - how quickly do I recover when I start to focus on how cold it can be? And how long do I want to “stay” in that cold and miserable frame of mind?

What I’ve found is that I can choose to make a whole day miserable if I focus on what’s not working and how I wish it was warmer, etc. And I can impact those around me - it’s contagious. But I also have the power to do just the opposite and focus on what is working about the “cold.”

BTW, this doesn’t mean that I deny my feelings. Absolutely not, that wouldn’t work either. I get to experience my authentic emotion, to be annoyed, frustrated, cold and all that good stuff. Then once I’ve acknowledged my real emotion, I get to decide what to do about it. What is important is to give myself permission to have the feeling, notice how long I stay there, be aware of my impact, and just notice whether the internal dialogue and focus supports and creates good energy, or not.

If not, then I am at choice to make a shift in my focus. Cool, eh?

So a funny thing to be writing about, AND as I sit here shivering in my shawl writing this (grin), it struck me that what we focus on creates more of the same. And it creates an impact. It’s not just about the cold - obviously, cold is just a metaphor. Whether it’s personal, professional, or physical - what we focus on expands.

So how does this apply to you, your life, your energy and your leadership? Notice what you notice and have a fantastic week!

Stay warm, cozy, and daring.

Until next time,

Setting Intentions & Action Plans for 2008

Hi there! Thanks for visiting the new blog! We are in the midst of giving the DTE Site a bit of a makeover and this is part of it. Would love to hear your responses, many of the changes are coming as we grow deeper and deeper into this brand, and many have actually come from some wonderful constructive feedback from loyal clients, colleagues and friends.

But enough about us…let’s talk about you…

Have you created your 2008 intentions yet? What about the action plan to make those intentions real?

As we come to the end of this year and reflect on what 2007 has been for us, I find myself quietly buzzing with excitement of the potential of 2008. I was going to say “the promise of 2008″ and stopped myself, because really there are no promises, are there? It’s up to us to make sure that we stay focused, authentic and in action in order to make our 2008 intentions a reality. And even with the best laid plans, sometimes the outcomes are not what we’d expect. Life happens. Plans change. Relationships grow or corrode.

What is truly a “promise” is that if we stay alert/conscious/present, real and fully engaged, we will experience the year and the people around us, be more aware of the impact we create and where our actions are taking us, and then be able to make powerful choices that are in alignment with the big vision.

Personally, I love this week. It’s one of my favorites of the year. And in addition to taking the week to be with family, relax, reflect, rejuvenate, and eat really good food (as well as read many books, take many naps and play many games ;))), I love to be with the “feeling” of the New Year approaching. While I tend to create my high level business plans for the year during the last quarter…it’s always fun to see the year approach and take my plans and intentions to a deeper level. There’s something about this week, between Christmas and the New Year, that provides the peace and space to really start getting ready; physically, mentally and spiritually, to move into the next year.

A little ritual I like to perform every year, at this time, is to take all the important areas of my life, rate them on a scale of 0-10 in terms of satisfaction and how fully engaged I feel I am in each area (ie. health, relationships, family, finances, physical environment, work, fun, integrity, etc. etc..), and then check in with if that “rating” is okay with me - or do I feel I want to make a shift? If I decide to make a shift, I can plug myself into the Dare To Engage Model, see where I’m at, and what/who I need to engage to do it, then lay out a plan - nothing intricate - of next actions and intended outcomes…and then I’m on my way. This helps me stay conscious of where I’m at in my own Life Map and Hero’s Journey, and where I may need to shift course so that I’m in alignment with my vision and plans. Simple simple exercise - will take you 30-60 minutes…if it appeals to you, or something like it - I invite you to go for it! Happy New Year!

BTW, my next article, the 3rd edition of the Special DTE Holiday Series, will come out later next week and will deepen the discussion on setting intentions and plans. The 2nd Edition, “DTE Wisdom from a 1st Grader”, will be released on New Year’s Eve. In both of these editions, I’ve also included a special section on Personal Sustainability. To ensure you recieve your copies, please make sure you’ve signed up for my Newsletter and Special Report at www.DareToEngage.com. (Right hand side of the page where you can enter your name and email address.)

Here’s to authentically engaged relationships and, of course, New Year’s Dares that will help you become even more of who you are,

Happy New Year all!

Anese

Hi! Welcome to the Dare to Engage Blog!

Do you remember the game “Truth or Dare”? Do you remember how fun and “spooky” it could be? Which did you choose? The Truth or the Dare? I always chose the dare…I liked to “stretch myself” (even then) and see if I could do things…but then I always loved to talk about the “truth” afterwards. It was, and is, one of my favorite games.

See, I don’t know about you, but being dared to do something has the impact of being called forth. When someone dares you - they’re doing it from a place of challenge and belief in you (or downright teasing as is often the case of 10 year old truth or dares), and if done right, with love. So that’s always my goal with clients…My dares are done from a place of belief in them, hunger for them to achieve their goals, a demand that they step up for their own learning, growth or movement, and ALWAYS with a lot of love…

And with these dares come lots of truth and transparency (ie. What is their truth in taking the dare? What scares them? What’s exciting? Why’s it important? Where’s the vulnerability?”)…because to me it’s about Truth AND Dare!

So join me on my blog..which is really about Truth and Dare…I love hearing what you’re thinking, what you’re stepping into and what’s you’re getting from the “dare” energy…and I’m always open to feedback, what you want to talk about, and how I can support you better. So let me know what you’re thinking these days! I dare you to!

To your forward moving dares,
Anese

8.10.07

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Wow. What a week. Last week was the week I moved my whole list of contacts over to the new DTE System. I had no clue how much work it would be. My whole team has been on this all week and we are still not done. The CANSPAM laws have made it pretty much impossible to get through to some servers. So even for clients and people that WANT to be on the system and opt-in and follow the process, it does not guarantee they will get anything.

If you have opted in to the site, and you have NOT received a confirmation from me, that means that we probably got stopped in your server filters. You have two options, you can register under your personal email address (although Yahoo filters are blocking many of these) or you can send me a personal note to and let me know. We will put you on a separate list and forward you the newsletters and information you are supposed to be getting. We willl do this for now until we come up with something better.

Unfortunately, I am told there is not a lot I can do about it. Even if I make a bunch of changes on my end, it is very possible that your company server will make changes next week that will have us start from square one. Aye yei yei. So let us know and I will make sure my team gets you the communications one way or another!

This experience has given me a fantastic lesson in perfection and not holding things so tightly. I so wanted this to be a smooth transition for everyone and for the bells and whistles to go off and for email harmony to ring over the DTE Community. NOT the case here. No matter how much time, energy or money I invest in this issue, there is only so much I can do. Perfection is out of my hands. I will continue to shoot for excellence instead. Or in this case, for good enough!

I invite you to take this on in your own life this week. When you look at it, shooting for excellence instead of perfection can be quite a relief. Can you feel the difference? Shoot for excellence vs. perfection. Excellence you can do something about, perfection is out of your control - and will make you crazy.

Next week the official blog posts start! Have a GREAT weekend everyone and thanks for your patience and support as our communications find a way to you!

Cheers!
Anese